Playdate nightmares: When getting together with a friend goes wrong

We've all had them: the playdate that goes horribly wrong. Mine was when the girls were small. I thought it would be fun to invite two little girls from preschool over to play. That's two little girls, plus the three I already had. FIVE. Under five. It would have been fine but one of the little girls didn't like what I made for dinner (fish sticks, usually a good choice, but obviously not in this case). I offered her macaroni and cheese. No thank you. Plain pasta? No, my mother always makes chicken sandwiches. Sorry I don't have any chicken. How about ham? My mother says it has too much salt. Your mum's right, but that's all I have. Uugghhh.  So ladies (and the two dads that read this blog), what's your worst playdate nightmare?

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Comments

[Jen]

Well, it wasn't awful awful but the time my daughter invited a friend for a sleepover and her friend decided to go home instead after dinner was tough on my daughter rather than me.

She was heartbroken and still (two years later) won't invite people to sleepovers here in case it happens again.

[A Modern Mother]

Jen -- oh that's so sad!

[Lisa]

My son has a very very over-active friend. One day we invited this boy was over for a play date and he happened to be in a very foul mood(probably due to lack of sleep the night before since he had a friend sleep over).

He just didn't want to play with my son and was downright nasty to him. He even threw a toy at my son's head. I scolded him, and when I told him I was going to take him home, he didn't seem to care, but my son was heartbroken.

In any case, this boy doesn't want to come over and play at our house anymore LOL.

[A Modern Mother]

We haven't had a sleep over yet -- and honestly I'm dreading it!

[Iota]

In my early days, when my oldest was 3 or 4, and not very practised socially, and we'd just moved to a new place, I invited over a mum with her daughter of the same age. It was fine at first, but then my son started insisting that the girl do something or other (can't remember what), and the girl didn't want to. My son just couldn't let it go, no matter how often I suggested other things, or tried to get involved myself ("I know, why don't we ALL play x or y TOGETHER"). He just COULDN'T drop it. It went on and on, in a repetitive mantra. I was at an absolute loss as to what to do.

Oh, and then there was the time when I had a couple of 8 year olds over, and one of them broke his elbow, and I didn't know. I gave it a quick rub, and sent him out to play again. (In my defence, he could wiggle his fingers and move the arm, and his crying SOUNDED really fake - although of course it was in fact genuine - and stopped very quickly.)

[Mwa]

My worst was when a girl came over to play, and walked around the hall with only her underpants and "bra" on (the girl was five). When I asked her why, she said she didn't want to, but my son had made her do it. He said she wanted to play Little Mermaid, and she doesn't wear much either.

[working mum]

Note to self - always check with parent!

I haven't had many playdates yet, but last summer's with the girl from down the road (which I blogged about)was a little bizarre as she (aged 5) announced Thomas the Tank Engine was babyish (my daughter has a T the TE bedroom), pulled out her mobile phone (yes, really) and then said she didn't want to play with anything. She's not been back.

[A Modern Mother]

Iota -- ooopps

Mwa -- oh my

Working Mum -- a 5-yr-old with a mobile phone, I'm stunned!

[whistlejacket]

My eldest is very bossy and likes encouraging his friends to take their clothes off (he undresses too) which isn't great. The most cringeworthy occasion was when we were at a friends' house and my son was playing with their daughter underneath her upturned swimming pool - they called it their 'den'. After a few minutes their daughter emerged from the den saying 'mummy I don't want to play in my den any more'. And then our son appeared from underneath the paddling pool, completely naked. He was only 3.5 but I still very embarrassed.

[Rosie Scribble]

My daughter hasn't really been on any playdates, as yet. However, I did once make the mistake of inviting two of her friends over (both boys) to play with her while there Mum was at work. I had assumed they would be here (pulling the place apart) for a couple of hours at most. Their mother collected them eight hours later. They haven't been invited back since, we go to theirs instead!

[A Modern Mother]

Whistle -- oh, yes, that is not good. Thank god we're past that stage... (I hope)

Roise -- OMG -- 8 hours later??!! I hope she paid you. That is outrageous!

[Expat Mum]

My little guy has a friend over last year who was either a brat or in a really bad mood. He wouldn't eat the lunch I made, even though I gave him exactly what he wanted. Then he kept throwing open my pantry door to find if I had "anything decent" to eat! He then proceeded to tell me that it was "the worst playdate ever", and that he wanted to go home. I would gladly have taken him but I knew his mother was at the dentist's. I must admit, I gave up trying to appease him and stopped caring about what he would tell his mother.
And the worse thing was that when she asked me how things had gone, I wimped out and said "fine".

[A Modern Mother]

Expat -- what a nightmare, and has he been back?

[Brit in Bosnia]

I'm missing playdates. We haven't really got any to organise with. But, then again, having read some of the horror stories I'm glad that we are not in the zone. 5 year olds with a mobile??!!!

[A Modern Mother]

Brit -- curious about pladates in Bosnia, do they differ, do they have them?

[clareybabble]

Have mostly had good playdates, although I have now learnt not to let S upstairs with his friends (puzzles tipped out everywhere, takes hours to put them all in the right boxes). His favourite thing to do at other people's houses is to strip off or empty out every single toy! That said, if they have a PC, he's quite content to sit and play on that, with or without the parent's approval!!

[Treemama]

Exactly why we don't have them. They scare the hell out of me!!!

Dear God, we've only had cousins over wrecking the house.

[A Modern Mother]

Tree --yes they can be a nightmare! But also a godsend if they go well.