A Modern Mother

Cybermums and social media week

 It's social media week which means the CyberMummy founders (me, Jen and Sian) are going to be very, very busy.

What's social media week? It connects people, content, and conversation around emerging trends in social media. And it's global.

We're going to be speaking at LBi and at a few other venues across London.

So watch out ... mum is definitely the word!

 

 

My photo shoot with OK Magazine

 
 
I'm officially a Three Mobile Mum, and one of my *ahem* duties was participating in a photo shoot for OK Magazine. A tough life I know. I fell in love with this little black dress (John Lewis Hobbs Limited Edition). What do you think, should I wear it to CyberMummy?? I know it's a few months away, but...

British parent blogger benchmark study

Are you a British parent blogger? Please fill out this benchmark study; it is anonymous and will only take a few minutes. We'll share the results when it's done. Who knows maybe we'll discover that the online middle class mum stereotype is all wrong. Or that you all bloggers are based in Birmingham. Regardless, this is your chance to have your say!

Create your free online surveys with SurveyMonkey, the world's leading questionnaire tool.

The mummy bloggers

 
You MUST go out and get the October issue of SHE magazine. There's a big fat photo of this blog on page 69. Really. I gave them a photo of myself but apparently it was rejected, they thought the blog looked better. The article also listed BMB and CyberMummy partner www.jenography.net as a must read, along with sandycalico.blogspot.com, singleparentdad.blogspot.com, and dooce.com! Go mums! (and Ian). Thanks to Suzanne at Skybluesea for flagging this for me

British mummy bloggers unite to save the children

Mum bloggers are the new black. They are fashionable and everywhere and I love it when they use their influence for the greater good.

Three bloggers that I respect immensely are heading to Bangladesh on 28 August to make a difference. Spearheaded by Save The Children, the plan is to put pressure on world leaders (do you hear us Nick???) at the UN Summit in New York to make due on promises to help mothers and children around the world. They want to get as many people as possible to sign the petition.

The bloggers include:

Sian from Mummy Tips (and fellow CyberMummy partner);

Eva from NixdMinx;

Josie from Sleep is for the Weak.

You rock ladies!

Please tune into BBC Radio Four Woman's Hour tomorrow

A selection of British Mummy Bloggers are appearing on BBC's Radio Four Woman's Hour tomorrow morning. Some will be live, many others have recorded posts to be read online. Woman's Hour has been informing and entertaining women for more than 50 years. So please tune in at 10 am and help celebrate the rise of mum blogging in the UK.

Listen to BBC Radio Four Woman's Hour 13/7 replay on iplayer

What I learnt from CyberMummy

What happens when you gather a group of 180 highly talented and influential women in a room together?*

Friends are made, advice is given, hugs and cupcakes are shared.

Can you please watch the baby, I just need to pop out and collect my pension

Jessie Versluys has been in touch. You might be familiar with her work: she was behind Katie: My Beautiful Face which aired on Channel 4 last year. She is researching a documentary about motherhood which will follow two women; a young teenage mum and an older woman, through the latter stages of pregnancy and life with their new baby. The programme will explore the life changing experience that unites both women at different stages in their lives.

She asked me what it was like becoming a mother at an older age and if it mattered. The short answer is yes and no. The long answer, well, read my story to find out...

Proud to be a mum

So now I am supposed to be embarrassed to be a mum?

I admit it -- looking after my children ranks way up there (can you see my hands pointing over my head, like I'm reaching over a peak?). Way above my career, my writing, and all that other stuff I do. I may bitch about it, but I love it, and I'm certainly NOT EMBARRASSED ABOUT IT nor do I think it is the "least respected job out there".

Being a mother consumes much of what I write about at the moment ... from the middle of a broken night’s sleep right through to parent teacher conferences and making sure my kids get something green into their bodies.  I am OK being in the mummy compartment right now. I don't feel uncomfortable or ill-at-ease being called a mummy.  I've been there and done all that other stuff.  I may feel different when I am not so deeply entrenched, but for now I'm first and foremost a mother.

Sorry, just needed to vent.  I am going to leave you now and go back to shaping my children’s world. I’ll probably blog about it too.

Grrrrrrrr.

Photo credit: stina121

On making Buzzy Bees with Annabel Karmel

This is a sponsored post

So .... I went to this blogger event in London. Traffic was bad and I arrived about an hour late. As I walked up to the Georgian House, I reached into the caverns of my bag in search of a mint. Rummaging around I found, oh, what's that? A gumi bear? Ouch! What the blank is that? I pulled out the name badge from the last blogger event.

Thank God some nice person handed me a steaming cup of coffee as soon as I arrived. I was just getting my barrings (spotting fellow bloggers NixdMinx, Are We Nearly There Yet Mummy, Who's the Mummy, A Mother's Rambling and Suburban Mummy) when I turned round to stare straight down at a waif of a woman with a big smile and equally big blond tresses. She said hello. This woman looked way too finished to be a mum blogger. Then the light went off.

OMG, you're Annabel Karmel! I blurted out. I remembered something about her in the email from the PR agency, and wished I had actually read the brief. It must be her, she looked exactly like the little photo in the back of all those cook books. Only smaller. Tiny. Like Minnie Mouse, with blond hair. My mouth felt dry.

Why you won't get rich by mum blogging

My friend Liz sent an interesting article my way ... one by The Brazen Careerist about being realistic about making money from your blog.

Before you head over there to read that (excellent) post, let me set you straight right now: THERE IS NO REAL MONEY IN MUMMY BLOGGING.

Let me rephrase that in case you blinked or didn't understand my accent: If you choose to turn your mummy blog into a commercial enterprise, you will earn, hold on to your hats ladies, upwards of couple grand a year. Gasp.

Want to be treated like a top blogger? Act like one.

I've observed popular bloggers for a while now. You know the ones I mean, the ones you constantly go back and read, over and over. They all have certain traits -- a special quality that makes them that little bit different. It's hard to put your finger on exactly what it is. You just LIKE THEM. ADMIRE THEM. Would consider leaving your husband for them.

Why? Who knows. But this stuff will help:

1. Write really good posts. I'll let you define what "good" means.

2. Be polite. Manners count online too. 

3. Be an active part of a community. Comment. Be involved. Know when to stay OUT of a conversation.

4. Think before you press publish. Sometimes words can be taken the wrong way.

5. Don't think before you press publish. Sometimes your best posts come straight from the heart.

Is being a good writer enough?

I first thought about this in relation to blogging thanks to Jen at Alpha Mummy.  She had just been to Blogher and Megan from Velveteen Mind had posed the question. Anyway, it's been bouncing around in my mind for a little while now and has been itching to come out...

Is being a good writer enough anymore?

If you don't care about readers, comments, and community -- the kind of stuff that rattles around in my mind-- stop reading this post RIGHT NOW. It will just annoy you. Then you will annoy me by writing some sort of "anti post" that is not "meant to be interpreted as an attack" (BTW - if you have to say that it obviously is). Just humour me and go somewhere else. Thanks.

The state of British Mummy Blogging 2009 and predictions for 2010

Last year I wrote a post about mummy blogging just starting to take off in the the UK. I had just created British Mummy Bloggers and frankly I struggled to come up with a list of 100 UK parent bloggers.

Now there are 800+ British Mummy Bloggers members and my inbox is so full of PR pitches I've had to open a new account.

So what happened in year? Mummy bloggers are hot. No, we aren't all running temperatures with swine flu. We're a hot commodity. I spoke with one PR firm yesterday that said they are ditching celebs for the "reality" factor that mum bloggers carry. Now don't go quoting this out of context. What I mean is that right now mummy bloggers are trendy. Who knows how long the trend will last -- but given what has happened across the pond, my money is on the longer term.

Want to know what a bunch of mummy bloggers look like?

This is a sponsored post.

Not bad, actually.

A bunch of us got together this weekend at the London Zoo. It rained. It rained really hard. It was cold. But the atmosphere inside was buzzing and we had a fab time. It was nice to meet so many online personalities. We really are an eclectic group.  What else would you expect with names like Potty, Rubbish, and NixdMinx. And bless the dads, they patiently let us gab away.

Thank you to Procter & Gamble for making it all happen. If you haven't checked out their new web site for women, www.supersavvyme.com, then head on over. It's a great site. I'm a contributor!

While we are on the subject of mummy blogging, the Cumbria Flood Auction is live. There's lots of cool stuff over there, and it's for a good cause (thanks DisneyMoviesUK for your donations).

Photo credit: Matt Crossick

Will the next election be won at the schoolgate?

A few mummy bloggers (me, Alpha Mummy, Potty Mummy, NixdMinx, and Karen from The Rubbish Diet) will be chatting today about our take on David Cameron's appearance on Mumsnet. So if you have a few spare minutes before school pickup, and want to add your two cents, head on over the Times' Alpha Mummy blog and let 'er rip. The event starts at 1.45.

UPDATE: After a slow start (and mummy bloggers proclaiming pot noodles as the new biscuit) Cameron finally appeared on Mumsnet and answered a few select questions on topics such as childcare vouchers (a keeper); schools (and plans to "bust up" the state monopoly); special needs (an end to school closures); and family tax (eliminate the couples penalty tax). He did of course evade some of the biggies: like Europe. If you want more info, the Guardian did a nice summary.

The answers were few and far between, and at one point Cameron had to change laptops during the Q&A. Perhaps this is why he answered way less questions than Gordon Brown in the same amount of time. I can't blame him though, live chatting is definitely a female multi-tasking thing.

Did this help him? Cyber mums are a tough crowd, but it did show a human side. And who doesn't love oat cakes with cheese?

British Mummy Blogger photo shoot for Red Magazine

It's tough promoting British mummy blogging. I had to go into London today for a Red Magazine photo shoot for a feature they are doing about my British Mummy Blogger network.

Such hard work. There were six (!) people there to fawn over us -- they did our make-up, fluffed our hair, dressed us, made us coffee. It made being a middle-aged mummy ... a little more interesting.

Mummy bloggers: We have an opportunity, let's take it

I have to admit to being a little flustered recently. All this talk around mumosphere about the British mummy blogging community getting  too competitive and too commercial. How the heck did this happen?

Money, or the misconception that money can be made from blogging, seems to be one of the drivers.  Can I just clarify one thing: THERE IS NO REAL MONEY IN BLOGGING. Did you hear me? Unless you are Dooce, your blogging intake will not get near any tax threshold. I've been in the top 10 the past year and I've made barely enough to fuel my Cafe Nero coffee habit. I make 100x more as a marketing consultant (and it takes less time). There are occasional freebies, but really how useful is a coffee mug, a wall clock, or another naff plastic toy? Some are nice, but do you really want all that extra stuff in your house?

British Mummy Bloggers Do It With Integrity

As a mummy blogging evangelist and founder of the British Mummy Bloggers social network, I've been following the debate about blogging ethics and reviews/sponsored posts with great interest. This is now official business in the US, with the FTC about to launch guidelines this summer.

Things seemed to hit a crescendo when Mom Dot, a social network for US mommy bloggers, announced a PR Blackout Challenge aimed at urging mommy bloggers to get back to basics after loosing the plot to the allure of giveaways, reviews, and blog trips.

In response, I wrote May British Mummy Bloggers Never Need a PR Blackout, more as a warning to our growing community of what may be in store if we don't learn from what has happened to mommy bloggers on the other side of the pond.

After several conversations and comments, it became clear that British mummy bloggers don't need a code of ethics. That would take all the fun out of blogging and make it seem more like work. Rather, we could all use a reminder of the issues of ethical blogging. Hence, British Mummy Bloggers Do It With Integrity was born.

May British Mummy Bloggers never need a PR blackout!

Mom Dot's PR blackout challenge has me wondering ... how the heck did it come to this?

Trisha, one of the founders of the community, explains: "With the allure of giveaways, reviews, and blog trips, Mom Bloggers have turned from what they love the most, their family, into working directly as public relations for their captive audience. It boils down to knowing your worth and then standing up for it."

I agree that PR has got the best of many mommy blogs and I tend to read the ones rich on content and lean on press releases. That's just my preference.

But as the founder of British Mummy Bloggers and a mummy blogging evangelist myself, I am worried. I feel a bit protective over our growing, supportive, and often naive community.

Where has the time gone?!

Breathe in, I'm a fresh-faced marcom exec ready to conquer Silicon Valley. Breathe out, I'm talking about whinging online mummy blogging to a room full of young PRs that have my same bright eyes and enthusiasm.

How did that happen?

I was at MS&L this week helping them to swot up on the whole mummy blogging phenomenon and explaining how they can work with parent bloggers (and not annoy them).

They were a very willing (and able) audience. I guess I wasn't surprised to see that PR is still a pink collar ghetto (there was one lone male in a sea of summer skirts). And only three of the 15 or so had children.

Do you remember what life was like before children? Me neither. Maybe if I squint. No, I'd have to down a bottle of wine. And sit in a darkened room.

In case you are wondering there was really no point to this post. Just that I am suddenly feeling like something has passed me by. I can just see my mother laughing quiety to herself about this one.

British Mummy Bloggers hit the Rainforest

Ever wonder what a group of bloggers with alias' like Potty Mummy, Surprised and Wahm-Bam look like?

Not bad, actually.

British Mummy Bloggers took over the Rainforest Cafe in London yesterday and I'd have to say we were a pretty interesting group of mums. There were varied accents, personalities and even a few tattoos; not to mention the adorable babies.

Thank you to Silver Cross for organising the event. Their MD Alan Halsall has done an excellent job of bringing the coveted British pram brand into the 21st century.  I have to say that I wish they had brought out the Doodle (which got an "oooohhh" from all the mums when we were shown the retractable UV visor) and the Halo highchair (which turns into a table/chair set) when mine were younger.

Please stop asking mummy bloggers to do stuff for free

It seems that the mummy blogger/PR relationship is really hard to get right -- even for our US counterparts. GeekMommy wrote an excellent post this week about Why Mom Bloggers Aren’t Flipping for Just a Sample of Your Product. You really need to read the full article, it points out that mothers that blog are doing a job and that PR should respect this and stop assuming that we will do things for free.

First, we need to get straight that mummy bloggers are not reporters. We don't get paid for what we do. We don't have an editor. We don't have a graphic designer. We don't have an IT department. We do it all ourselves in our spare time. We might write about your product if we like it and think it is useful, but come on, quit asking us to do competitions and giveways for free. 

All in a week's work

I thought I'd catch you up on some of the more interesting responses to all the publicity around the rise British mummy blogging....

Andrex contacted me about the launch of their new "Puppy Points" scheme. The trolley dash sounded like loads of fun, but since I don't have any pets I politely declined. Of course I felt silly when hubby informed me that Andrex make toilet tissue and they have adorable lab pups on their label (I buy the cheapest I can find at Tesco so hadn't noticed this before).

The state of British mummy blogging and the best ones of 2008!

So, the other day at coffee, I brought up my mummy blog. I might as well been speaking Slovenian. Non capiche.

What’s a mummy blog?” asked one of the mums, a particularly chummy friend of mine who loves veg patches as much as I do.

“It’s a place where mums can share info, write about their experiences, make new friends, stay sane," I said as enthusiastically as I could, but the look on her face said it all. “Why?” was oozing out of her.

Now remember, I live in the heart of the Thames Valley, the tech capital of the UK. Many of these mums either have worked in the IT industry, or have husbands who work in IT industry.